Etty Lau Farrell’s time in the spotlight has been a long time coming. For nearly two decades, the Married to Rock alum has supported some of the biggest acts in rock and roll, including Mötley Crüe, Madonna, and of course, husband Perry Farrell’s own Jane’s Addiction. But August 20th will mark a new chapter for Perry Farrell’s wife: The classically trained dancer is taking center stage for her very first single, “He’s a Rebel.”
“It’s my first song I really sing lead on, and that was chose specifically for me versus me singing backup,” she tells me from the press tent of Lollapalooza, the music festival Perry founded 30 years prior that Etty now serves as a board member for.
A fresh take on The Crystals’ 1962 hit of the same name, albeit with some massaged lyrics by none other than Perry himself, the new tune marks a natural evolution for the mother of two, who’s gone from captivating Jane’s Addiction audiences with her sensuous moves as a backup dancer to taking the mic as a backing vocalist for Perry’s subsequent group, Satellite Party, in 2004.
While that band would prove to be short-lived, with guitarist Nuno Bettencourt and drummer Kevin Figg leaving the band in 2007, it marked the beginning of a new chapter for Etty. “When [Perry] lost his band, and we were working on the album in the garage, I started laying some vocals,” she says of her transition to singing. Now, she’s coming into her own. “From Satellite Party, it became Kind Heaven Orchestra,” she says. “It’s a work in progress. … I do feel like now, with Rebel … with the 15 years I’ve put in, I’m finally ready to step in front and be my own performer.”
***
The next night, we’re on the roof of the Pendry in downtown Chicago when Etty makes good on her words. Perry’s Founders’ Lollapalooza afterparty is in full swing, and the magnetic frontman has taken the stage with his fellow Kind Heaven Orchestra members, Etty among them in a short, tight baby pink cocktail dress with a ruched bodice and a bow at the center. I briefly wonder if it’s by Dolce and Gabbana. “I’ve been collecting them since the ‘90s,” she tells me of the designer duo. “I love that brand, and I love Westwood, of course, and I love McQueen.”
The frock’s sweet-yet-sultry vibes play perfectly to the intimate crowd of 40 or so, which cheers loudly as Etty steps into the limelight for “Spend the Body”—a cheeky pop tune from Kind Heaven’s self-titled 2019 album. The moment she does, the energy in the room seems to shift. Etty herself describes the feeling best. “When you’re at a music festival, you’re watching band after band with men dressed in black. When a woman walks out, it is special, it is wonderful,” she says.
She’s certainly not resting on the laurels of her feminine wiles, however. “I do think that as a woman, I have to work harder,” she shares while reflecting on being a female performer in a genre—actually, make that an industry—that’s predominantly dominated by men. “I have to be twice as good—especially being that I started out as a dancer with Jane’s Addiction. For me to switch careers … I have to have very little margin of mistakes. … I feel like I’m being judged more.”
For Etty, that’s not necessarily a bad thing, however. “It inspires me, and it makes me work harder and be better and more than I already am.”
In addition to busting her ass onstage, the performer, who has a hand in many of her and Perry’s shared business ventures, takes her cues from other strong women who have come before her. “Our lawyer, Jamie Young, is one of the biggest entertainment lawyers, and I ask her for advice,” she says. Among those nuggets of wisdom? “In the heat of the moment, you remain calm,” she says. “I think there is a wisdom to women who’ve done this, including Sharon Osbourne, all the women that’s really paved the way for somebody like me to now step in.”
Etty also relates to women like Susan Holmes McKagan, with whom she shared the screen for E’s 2010 hit series, Married to Rock. But don’t expect the pair to reprise their roles alongside former castmates AJ Celi and Josie Stevens anytime soon. “I honestly think that the show, as much as it gave me a lot of experience and opened up a different door to me … it did not really in depth go into what it really is like to be married to a rock star,” Etty says. “I am one of the lucky ones that work with my husband, we tour together, but for other women, their husbands go on the road for two, three months at a time, and she is the one that’s left home, holding the fort down,” she says of musician wives. “I don’t feel [the show] showcased the strength and … the depth of what women do that’s behind the scenes in this world. ”
It certainly didn’t showcase the depth of Etty’s own reach. While Perry admittedly serves as the driving creative force behind many of the couple’s musical endeavors (“At the end of the day, he’s been doing it so much longer than me, I trust his judgment,” Etty says), his wife is no shrinking violet when it comes to their affairs. “With Perry and I, not only are we in a marriage, but we’re also partners in life, all facets of life, domestically, work wise, creatively …” she trails off. “Perry is so incredibly creative, and he thinks on a such a different plane, that sometimes the details of life he tends to miss.”
And when he does? Etty is there to catch them. “[That’s] why we ended up as such a good couple,” she muses. “Because his strengths are my weaknesses, and his weaknesses, are definitely [my strengths]. When they say behind every successful man there’s a woman, I’m the woman!” she laughs.
***
The evening is winding down at the Pendry, but there’s one very important song left to sing. “Get up there kid, it’s your turn,” Perry says as he gleefully makes way for his other half to step into the spotlight. The first chords of “He’s a Rebel” ring out through the sky, and Etty belts out each note into the night, all the while coquettishly balancing on her pink platform heels. The crowd is eating up every word, as is Perry—”I’m her rebel!” he proudly proclaims. Etty Lau Farrell has arrived.
